Life's a blog

My blogging inspiration comes from everyday life. I draw from all sorts of experiences, situations, people, music, just everything. I've always enjoyed playing with words and sentences so blogging for me is an extension of life as I see it and a great way for me to continue playing with words. Most of my blog posts are written in my head before they ever reach the paper. Lots of them have yet to even meet paper -- they're just sitting in my mental queue.

I love sharing my weight loss journey, my life with you through blogging. Like a photographer, artist, musician, athlete blogging for me is my outlet and my way of sharing myself with you. Thanks for allowing me to share, inspire, motivate, and encourage. For me, life's a blog.

Have a great weekend!

Entitlements

I've mentioned before how I love surrounding myself with positive, encouraging folks -- losing 175 lbs. is too hard without a support system. Well, I met a guy about six months ago at the gym who totally inspires and encourages me. I've come to admire and adore him. I've written about him before "Do What You Can" fella.

Yesterday, I received a beautiful, insightful email from him on the topic of motivation. I would like to share it with you as it piggybacks off of yesterday's post, "Don't give up on yourself."

So here it is: from Stephen Nelson aka "Do What You Can" fella

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I have been told by many that we can not motivate others – and I agree.  But, we can discuss what tools we use to keep ourselves where we want to be, and hope others find something that works.

And so, this is a random meander through my thoughts on motivation as I stretched this morning.

OK then, let’s start with motivation for stretching:  I feel better when I get done.

Really short term.  And effective.

When I was in college I made a rule – I didn’t have to study evenings on days that I took a test.  OK – made it pretty important to get homework done ahead of time, but being able to go visit my lady friend (who was at another university some 35 miles away) was a strong motivator.  And, with time, I came to look forward to taking tests.  See – “test” equaled “quality time with my lady friend”.  Coming to view tests as a positive thing has served me extremely well – it is amazing how much better one does when one is not nervous about a test – is in fact excited about the test.

 So, while my first example reflects being honest with oneself (you really will feel better if you start your day with stretches) my second involves a bit of prevarication – overall it was sometimes a real challenge to make my test night off rule work – but it made me look forward to taking tests.  And resulted in better grades.

I call this my lying to myself rule.  Or maybe just misleading myself.  It leads to my next example – I told myself, when I was doing the 8 to 5 routine (30 years as an engineer) that working out was what I did everyday for me.  Every day.  For me – not for someone else.  And, whilst true, the corollary was the import thing – No one was going to take it away from me.  Everyday I worked out at lunch.  Which meant I missed a lot of the noon group sessions with people who’s waist lines grew every year.  Don’t get me wrong, I was not a body builder or anything like that – I was just a skinny engineer who was reasonably fit.  And who had a reputation for not “doing lunch”.  Hurt my career – likely.  Hurt my fitness – like NO!

And today – when I retired 3 years ago, I gave myself a couple of presents.  One was the right to work out 2 hours each day (OK – I take the weekends off to recover) and the other was getting to play the hammered dulcimer.  If one looks at such things as a right – as something we entitle ourselves to do – an entitlement – and then we treat them as rights or entitlements (as in not letting silly things get in their way) – at least for me, I have a better chance of keeping them going.  

And, hey, if one does in fact keep them going, one can actually do a really great job of improving ones strength and physique, as well as making beautiful music.

Funny that, when I feel frustrated by something, I often find myself reflecting on how much I have improved my bod, or how much I love the music I now play, and feel pretty darned good about myself.  These two “entitlements” have become two significant sources of satisfaction in my life.  People need to realize – satisfaction, happiness, they come from doing – not from sitting on ones backside.  I suspect satisfaction is going to be a recurring theme in my writing – I suspect you have heard the expression “curiosity killed the cat”.  Interestingly this in only the first part of an important truism – the second part is “satisfaction brought he/she/it (politically correct equivalent of “him) back”.

Lying to oneself – hmmm – if it means convincing oneself that working out and practicing a musical instrument are what we are going to do – I’m all for it.

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There you have it folks. I hope you enjoyed his words and perhaps even feel motivated.  He's contemplating starting his own blog. He so gets my vote to go for it!

Don't give up on yourself

Bear with me I've been bitten by the speech bug and I'm still kind of in that mode.

There I was all by myself trembling, sweating, and about to give up on the plank. If I gave in and released the plank, who would know? It was in that moment I recalled being in boot camp fatigued and ready to collapse to the ground from plank position when the instructor, Jen said these words, “Don’t give up on yourself.” I held the plank that day because of those inspiring words and ever since have used them to help me get through tough workouts. After all, throughout all this there is ONLY me. This isn’t a show for anyone else. I don’t show up at the gym just because I want to be seen there or have bragging rights about having gone there. I started this journey because of an internal desire to change myself.


At 388 lbs. I was a miserable soul, so whenever I get discouraged or feel like giving up I remember the alternative. This battle is not being fought for anyone else. This battle is mine and mine alone. I push myself to the limit because I never, ever, ever want to return to that lonely, miserable place again. I push myself because I want to be healthy and fit. I push myself because I want to look good. Heck, one day I want to sashay around in a pair of 4” heels. So when I’m working out and at the brink of giving up from embarrassment, fatigue, or a combination thereof, I push through.


I've been talking a lot lately with Steve my trainer/buddy about how we wish we could find the magic solution to keep folks motivated. I talk to lots of folks through my blog and FB page - I love when folks reach out to me. That's one of the reasons I blog. Anyhow, I notice folks sometimes seek my advice and they start off with great intentions then all the sudden I don't hear from them anymore. Too often Steve gets clients that start working out with him who are all revved up and next thing he knows they cancel their appointments. Of course, there could be a number of factors as to why these folks cancel and stop seeking advice -- please, I don't want to assume anything, but I will say this is a mental battle like no other. I believe, perhaps folks set their expectations to high and when the return doesn't happen fast enough they give up.

Folks when the going gets tough, you have to figure out a way to talk past the demons. They'll be all sorts of demons telling you, you can't do it -- it's too hard. The road to a healthy, fit lifestyle is not going to be easy. Especially, with all the set-ups: Fast, cheap, convenvient food, drive-thrus, etc. There are going to be obstacles, but you have to find a way to manuever around them. It's not about me, Steve, your spouse, your daughter -- this is about YOU. Don't give up on yourself.


Take it from someone who to date has lost more than 170 lbs. and counting. I'm not just talking out the side of my neck. Oh, the obstacles I've encountered. Believe me, I know how hard it is. But, I also know that I'm worth it. I'll never, ever give up on myself.

Like minds

I believe I've mentioned this before, I ♥ working out! As a fat person with a slothenly attitude I avoided physical activity like the plague. And, the gym would have of course been out of the question. Now, that I'm on a mission to live a healthy, active lifestyle I love going to the gym. The gym is my playhouse. I get my exercise on, chat with folks, and share ideas. The gym is the place where I feel like I'm a part of the team --the team that I was not a part of in my youth.

At the gym, we all are working towards the same ultimate goal - to be fit and healthy. As I'm getting my work out on, I like glaring around the gym and watching everyone else's workout routine. The buffed guy back in the corner hitting the hang cleans. The toned female taking the length of the gym doing lunges with weights in her hands. The not so sure lady on the treadmill going at a snail's pace. No matter, we are all there trying. I love it. Love it. Love it.

Those who know me, know I'm not shy. So it's pretty easy for me to conjure up conversation and boy do I. I've made so many acquaintances and friends at my gym. I've gotten some useful tips and info from inside the walls of 24 Hour-Fitness. For me it's been important to surround myself with folks that are like minded. Sure, not everyone at the gym is exactly on the same level or page as me, but for the most part, most are and I need positive, encouraging folks to keep me focused. It's too hard otherwise. Again, I say, I ♥ working out and hanging with folks that have like minds.

"Free Your Mind"

Jeannine in the middle

At the time, I started taking Zumba classes I weighed in about 290 lbs. and was very out of shape. Not only was I physically out of shape but this was at the beginning of my self-transformation journey and so my mind was still full of negative thoughts and ideas.

One day while I was waiting with other ladies for Zumba class to start -- about the second week of taking the class (three tmes a week) I began chit chatting with two of the ladies who were regulars. One of them seemed to have such a cheery disposition while the other lady just kind of stared at me - it seemed like in disgust. The cheery disposition woman, Dotsy, Hawaiian descent - tall, curvy. The other lady was a white, blue-eyed, thin woman. Anyhow, since I had become a die hard Zumba fan I started to be around these women quite a bit. Just so happens that on another day I was joking and talking with them. Full of sass -- I said something like, soon I'll be tiny like her (white, blue-eyed, thin woman) and be able to expose my midriff too. She (blue-eyed, thin woman) said "No I want to be curvy like you." Huh? Really? So this wrecked my theory. I thought, Jeannine, was totally grossed out by me, by my fatness. Heck, my blackness. I had even deemed her as a stuck up little white woman. Ha ha.

Over time, I became even more friendly with the ladies and besides gyrating and shaking together we would go to coffee, lunch, etc. In talking to Jeannine more I found out that she is not white, not stuck up, she looks at me with great admiration (even called me her fitness hero), and thinks I'm beautiful. Wow! Talking about reading someone wrong.

Jeannine and I have become dear friends. She is a huge supporter of my blog -- supporter of me. She has come to my Stella & Dot jewelry party, Healthy Cooking class, and when I fractured my leg she took me to my first physical therapy appointment. Her sister passed away a few months ago she called me because she wanted me to go shopping with her. She said that I would boost her spirits like no one else could. We shopped, laughed, and enjoyed lunch together that day.

Rollin' in Tangerine Dream

I'm so glad the universe brought us together. And, more importantly thank goodness I let go of my negativity and opened up my heart to receive this gift, this beautiful friendship. Jeannine is a fit, colorful woman full of life and wisdom. I'm amazed at her great big heart - she doesn't kill ants instead she moves them back outside. I love you, Jeannine Adelina Grandjean!

I'm singing the EnVogue song from the early 90's

 "Free your mind and the rest will follow

Be color blind, don't be so shallow..."

**I only used race to show how narrow minded I was - not prejudice. Quite the opposite, but...you get where I'm going I hope.